Why are people Idiots?

While driving through the five o'clock rush hour in Walnut Creek I found myself in the typical "I'm in a hurry get out of my way" state of mind only to have the universe tell me that I need to to slow down and take a chill pill. That's right folks, I hit just about every red light possible on my way downtown. Why is it that when you're in a rush there always seems to be a brake happy elderly person in front of you or it seems that the guy at the control station is having way too much fun pushing the 'red light' button exactly where you seem to be at that moment?
I can see it now, some little ginger sitting at his desk with his big monitor watching all the cars and laughing his head off as he stops the same car at a red light over and over and over again! I must admit I'd get a kick out of it if it were me pushing the button. But as it stands all I want to do is hit him over the head with a mallet. I'm sure I'd feel better then.
What's worse than all of the red lights and slow drivers are the drivers who feel it necessary to weave in and out of traffic getting nowhere but sufficiently pissing everyone off in the process. I had one such driver cut me off twice on my way home. I wanted to ram my big SUV bumper up his stupid low riding Monte Carlo butt, but alas I restrained and felt satisfied when I got in front of him and intentionally stopped at a fresh yellow light. :) hehehe...take that stupid head!

I know I'm not the only one with road rage, any funny stories to share?